- Yes, there was also pain, it remained in the past. And there was also love that we could not save.
- In fact, you couldn"t. And if you had cared, you would have taken my hand and said: "I"m here, I will not give you up".
- I did not have the time to do that.
- It is an outright lie. You only thought about yourself.
The Dead Sea, or A lover cannot buy happiness
The silence of the April night was interrupted by a child's piteous cry: "Mom, Mom!" Delia abruptly threw off the blanket and rushed into the nursery. Frantically groping for the light switch, she pressed both push buttons simultaneously. The room was instantly filled with bright light, but ... There stood a lonely empty cot looking at Del again. The bed was not crumpled, and it seemed that the child was somewhere nearby, or had just gone somewhere to have a rest or was staying overnight at her parents". His soft toys arranged around the cot were looking at the young beautiful woman in bewilderment. One could easily read the question in the toys" eyes: "Where has your little son and our best friend gone?"
Seeing the lifeless nursery, the woman closed her eyes, ran her hand on the switch, feeling for the switch buttons, and in a moment started to cry unable to hold back her tears. Her back was slowly sliding down against the wall until she touched the floor, and was sitting now with her head buried in her knees. Biting her lip, Del began sobbing uncontrollably. It was an incredible heartbreaking wail, turning into the cry of a mother who had lost her child.
Morning dawned. Delia came up to the mirror and could not recognize herself: instead of a cheerful lively girl a distraught woman was looking at her. Her disheveled hair, face wet with tears and swollen lips testified to her unbearable grief. Dark shadows lay under her eyes; red unhealthy spots randomly covered her cheeks and neck. Still sobbing she turned on the tap and, folded her hands into a small boat, and filled them with cold water. And then the irrepressible memory threw her back to six months before. Del remembered how little Florian was childishly clumsily folding his hands in the same way, trying to fill them with water. And the water, as if playing with him, was running through his fingers in spurts.
"Why, what for?" - the devastated Delia kept saying, and then, covering her face with hands, she gave vent to tears and sobs again. Her body was trembling, and she went into dumb hysterics.
Six months is probably a sufficient period of time for people to erase small details from their memory, but not in Delia"s case. Now, she could still quite clearly remember every minute, every second of her stay at the luxurious five-star hotel on the Red Sea coast. Sunny Sharm-el-Sheikh warmly welcomed the young couple with their blonde boy. The little fidget had just turned six and he was very smart and inquisitive for his age. Florian loved the sea, the sun and the white sand. He could sit in the water on the beach for hours building sand castles, and waves that took a liking to the boy gently splashed around caressing his tanned body. When the father"s voice "Florian, come up to me!" was heard on the shore, the wave became jealous and with a disgruntled whisper rolled ashore as if trying to protect the child. A week flew by in a wink of an eye. The ill-fated Friday came. It seemed to be an ordinary day just like the others. After an afternoon nap, the son implored Delice to go to the waterslides by the children"s pool. All the way, he was twittering something and literally dragging his mum keeping a tight hold on her hand. Once there, Delia put their things on two vacant sun loungers, one for herself and the other for Florian. A couple of minutes later, the boy went down the waterslide with a merry squeal. Each time, Florian chose a faster ride. After observing her son having fun and seeing that it was not dangerous, Delice went to the bar to order two juices for them.
After a few dozen steps, she suddenly felt that an unknown force made her stop and look back. She hadn"t seen anything yet, but she was already feeling that something terrible happened. Delice rushed back to the children"s pool and saw her child lying on the tiles, and the frightened children standing by. Florian was lying motionless on his back with his eyes closed.
- What has happened? - she screamed at the kids . And she was already lifting her child"s motionless body.
- He slipped and fell down, - a boy of eight years old muttered under his breath. She turned to him. - Like this! - And he randomly waved his arms, showing how Florian was falling down onto the slippery tiles and hit the back of his head.
Her child opened his eyes slowly and whispered:
- Mother, you won"t scold me, will you?
Delice felt the tears dripping down her cheeks.
- Of course not, son. Are you in pain, honey?
- No, Mom, I just feel sleepy, - Florian was barely able to say and slowly closed his eyelids.
Delice' heart suddenly sank, she trembled, and in a moment rushed to the hotel reception desk, holding her son firmly to her chest.
- Call the doctor immediately, - she screamed.
The color was draining from Florian"s face, his lips were turning dangerously blue, and only the wet curls of his blond hair dropped the last subtle hints to signs of life in the boy"s body. A few minutes later, a doctor showed up, gave the child a quick check-up, and started CPR.
With the siren wailing loudly the ambulance pulled up to the medical center at breakneck speed. Which is going to be faster? Life or death? There"s always a winner in this eternal race. This time the doctors didn"t make it, they couldn"t save little Florian. Delice went numb, she couldn"t utter a word, instead she only let out an indistinct moan.
*****
Del lifted her head and looked back at herself in the mirror. Not knowing what she was doing, she started splashing cold water on her face. She suddenly found herself bringing her palms up to her face several times, and every time her lips touched the cold water, she downed it in long gulps. It was only after that she slowly came to her senses.
Another unbearable night passed, followed by another morning that was just as dark. Delice still couldn"t come to terms with her overwhelming grief, she found it harder and harder to overcome it.
So, that day still inconsolable in her grief, she took some anti-depressant pills, and then, as if on autopilot, got dressed and called a taxi.
*****
The car stopped smoothly at the entrance to the Prater City Recreation Park. Delice loved this picturesque place. In the not-so-distant past, she often came for walks here with her son. He could go on the rides for hours on end, begging to have one more ride again and again. Delice didn"t give any thought to why she was there or what she was going to do in the park. On that wet, rainy morning, it was intolerable to stay at home and sink deeper and deeper into grief. She was dying to reach out for her recent past which was filled with so many hopes, joys and her child"s smiles. Del walked down the Prater"s central alley, trying to recall the vivid moments she and her son shared. She stopped to sit down on the bench where she and her son would eat their full of cotton candy and prattle their feet in a funny childish way. As she was walking down the alley, the young woman seemed to feel the enquiring gaze of all the objects that still kept the warmth of her son"s hands. They were about to ask why she was alone. It made her heart very bitter. The rain was getting heavier, driving lonely strollers to seek shelter. Delice didn"t feel like going into the cafe. Her eyes accidentally caught the sight of the giant Viennese Rizenrad Ferris wheel. Something incredibly warm crossed her mind, and she didn"t hesitate to head for the ticket box. Her ticket in hand, the young woman suddenly noticed that there were hardly any visitors in the park. The reason for this was the weather, or, to be more precise, the nasty weather. Del slowly stepped into Rizenrad"s cabin, the interior decoration of which resembled an old tram car, approached one of the eight windows, took hold of a handrail and pressed her cheek against the glass. It was not raining but pouring now as if the shower was trying to give the old town a good wash. Delice leaned closer and stared into the distance, trying to make out the farthest areas of Vienna in the shroud of rain.
- Good afternoon, - she heard a man"s voice behind her back. Delice shuddered in surprise, then slowly turned her head.
- Good day, - she said with a very sad smile. - A good rainy one, - she didn"t even know why she said that, the words just came out. And the stranger immediately took what she said aloud for an invitation to have a conversation.
- My name is Lucas, and I"m here by chance. I could never imagine I"d be on a Ferris wheel in the morning on a rainy day.
He looked closely at the woman. The dark heavy tresses fell on her shoulders, her grey-green eyes were full of tears, a small nose of a nice shape, a fine chin - everything was bearing a touch of deep sorrow. She was wearing a short leather jacket, a grey pullover, and dark blue jeans that complimented her beautiful figure. She had a very attractive appearance, some mysterious female fragility that made men go mad. She had a special charm that could turn anyone"s head. Without waiting for an answer, he continued.
- A month ago, I lost my mother, and today all of a sudden, I was overwhelmed with sad memories, so I decided to go to the places I used to visit in my bygone childhood. You have no idea how much I loved riding the Ferris wheel. Fifty years passed but the cabins haven"t changed at all: the same walls, the same seats. - Lucas spoke softly, turning to the window and looking sadly far into the distance.
Suddenly, something flashed through Deliсe"s mind, and now she was carefully examining the man. He looked about forty-five, though judging by the way he sounded, he could be at least fifty-five. He had a crew cut hairstyle and his dark hair was almost salt-and-pepper now. The piercing brown eyes gave away an extraordinary mind. And then, there were his lips, they were slightly fleshy with incredibly beautiful smooth lines. A small dimple on his chin showed a firm and strong-willed character. He was dressed simply and, at the same time, elegantly. He was wearing a brown short jacket made of fine leather, dark blue jeans like Delice"s, and blue sports shoes.
At least ten minutes passed, and the wheel was completing its dizzying circle, so the man and the woman approached the exit door of the cabin. Delice was standing a little behind Lucas, but still her sensitive nose caught the subtle spring fragrance of his perfume. She breathed in deeper, as if she wanted to remember this smell, and suddenly caught herself thinking that they had a lot in common and that she didn"t want them to go each their way.
******
The phone rang. The psychoanalyst lazily reached for the handset.
- Hi, buddy. I bet you didn't expect to hear from me?
Sigmund almost dropped the phone in surprise.
- Hi, I must confess I didn't! Felix, what happened, spill.
- Nothing special except I"ve just missed good booze and decent company.
- Don"t play games with me, Felix, no one calls to talk about drinking when a working day is in full swing.
- You are a cunning fox, you can't be fooled, Felix Friedland picked up a joking tone.
- Well, of course, you, in your gynecology, have forgotten how one should talk to men.
Sigmund began to gently put pressure on his friend.
- Come on, let"s have it. What happened?
- Okay, I admit, I"m calling about a case, but it's very delicate. I don"t think we can figure it out without a couple of glasses of beer and roasted knuckle. Come on, it"s on me.
- Well, buddy, that"s a game changer. Actually, that"s where you should have started, and you keep beating around a bush, old sport. And they both burst out laughing. After chatting a little longer, the two old friends arranged to meet the following day in the beer garden of the old Schweizerhaus, which was in the green part of Vienna Prater Park.
*****
An elderly man was walking leisurely along the green alley. His stately gait full of dignity gave away a self-confident man. Sigmund Hoffman, a renowned Austrian psychoanalyst with extensive private practice, was the embodiment of intellect and culture. An impeccable suit and shiny polished shoes spoke of the wearer"s meticulousness and neatness. As he stopped now and then, he would look up at the crowns of the old trees, then down as if recalling something, and then would walk on. The park was fresh after a recent rain. The leaves regained their bright green colour and, dressed up in tiny raindrops, glistened in the sunset light.
"Can it really be two hundred and fifty years old?" said Sigmund to himself. "It is unbelievable how many people have passed here. Some members of the royal family could have strolled down this alley, Mozart or Strauss also may have been walking along it. Or maybe exactly on this day 100 years ago, his namesake, Sigmund Freud, was wandering deep in thought around the park, another doctor just like him, seeking and hesitating, well - known but underestimated by his contemporaries. Today, it is surprising that he, Sigmund Hoffman, living a century after the father of psychoanalysis, reserves the right to agree or disagree with the conclusions made by the great scientist based only on his intuition. It is true that some of his statements look naive and absurd nowadays, but overall Freud"s teachings on psychoanalysis seem monolithic and incontrovertible".
Not far from the entrance to the restaurant Sigmund spotted Felix"s figure which clearly stood out. He was a short man in his 60s, with a large nose, bulging eyes and big gray hair carelessly dishevelled in a sort of a men"s hairdo. Having noticed Sigmund, Felix smiled cordially and welcomed his friend with open arms.
- I was beginning to get worried. I thought something wasn"t working out and you weren"t going to make it.
- Did you hope to drink my beer and have the roasted knuckle all to yourself? - Sigmund returned the joke. - No way, here I am. So, pal, take me to your den and treat me to your promised stuff.
- I"ll admit, buddy, the idea of drinking everything by myself crossed my mind but when I remembered who I was meeting, I thought I"d rather die hungry than listen to your reproaches.
- Come on, Hoffman patted Felix on the shoulder, - no offense, show me the way, I"m looking forward to the feast of my life.
After walking through the pub hall, the friends stopped in the centre at a large rectangular table.
- Here we are, - Friedland invited him to sit down.
- You have pleased the old man - Sigmund unwittingly said, he even rubbed his hands at the tempting sight. On the table, there was a pork knuckle of an unbelievable size, which was stuffed and roasted to a golden crust, producing an incredibly delicate aroma. On a smaller plate next to it was a mound of sauerkraut. This idyllic was crowned with two liters of cold beer with white caps of strong froth.
- Oh Felix, knowing you, I feel you"ve got a tough question for me. Why don"t you just pop it out so we don"t have to try to figure it out once we"re tipsy?
- You"re right, as usual, but let"s do it later, Professor, - Felix was trying to stall the conversation.
- As you wish. Later it is then, - said Sigmund, and they raised their glasses and took several gulps of the foamy drink.
- Schweizerhaus beer is said to be the most delicious in Vienna, - Friedland started the conversation.
- They can say anything, but you and I know for a fact it"s the most delicious, - Sigmund easily ended the conversation which had barely started.
- Look, Hoffman, you"re really getting old. You have a bad temper, you don"t let me say a word, let alone tell you something.
- Felix, try the weather, maybe that one will go down better,- Sigmund laughed loudly.
- Why on earth do I put up with you? - said Felix turning his eyes and palms to the sky as if he was turning to God.
- Because we"re old friends, and we know first-hand what a strong male friendship is. Okay, Felix, calm down, you know you are like a brother to me.
Sigmund raised his glass and looked over its rim straight into Friedland"s eyes. Felix responded with the same high-pitched look and a moment later he called the waiter and ordered a bottle of vodka. Sigmund didn"t see that coming from his old friend. Apparently, the situation was more serious than he thought. After a while a bottle of "Absolute" and a couple of shots appeared on the table. Vodka was just what was needed to make further conversation more sincere.
Sigmund filled the shots with the strong spirit for the third time.
- To women, may they have a better life than we do,- Friedland spoke softly and, after a quick drink, reached for the sauerkraut. Hoffman noted to himself something was clearly wrong with his friend.
- Look, Felix, don"t keep it to yourself, tell me about it, - softly murmured the psychoanalyst.
- I can"t, - Felix suddenly lost it, his shoulders shaking. - I can"t, you know, I can"t. Do you know why I haven"t called you for so long? No, you don"t know! The reason is I lost my grandson. Yeah, Sigmund, it seems incredible, but it did happen. And now I"ve called on you to save this child"s mother.
His shoulders trembled at the sobbing he was trying to contain.
- Yeah, you didn"t know, but now I"m asking for help. Help her, she lost her son, and I lost my grandson.
- Felix, calm down. What has happened?
Sigmund had never seen his close friend so depressed. - What can I do for you?
- Delice is my patient and my illegitimate daughter. She needs help. I"m begging you to help her out.
- What"s wrong with her? - incredulously asked Sigmund.
- She has clear signs of a false pregnancy.
- What do you mean?
- The menstrual cycle is knocked down, daily nausea in the morning, breast swelling and a lot of secondary signs. But there"s no pregnancy, and I can see it on the physical examination, and the ultrasound results say the same thing.
- And so what?
- This is a fake pregnancy, and I want you to convince her of that.
- To convince who? Your daughter?
Sigmund stared at his friend.
- Just explain one thing to me. You, an old bachelor, never mentioned any serious long-term relationships. And now there"s a daughter. How did that happen, Felix?
- It"s a story I keep deep in my heart. No one, not even you, my closest friend, was aware of my relationship with Felicia. Felix was indifferently forking a bowl of sour cabbage.
-Yes, Delice is my daughter.
From the nervous fatigue, Friedland tilted his head. - Help her, Sigmund. Tell her it"s not true! - he whispered quietly.
-Are you sure, my friend? Won"t I hurt her?
- She"s not pregnant, it"s a delusion.
- Frankly speaking, I"ve never diagnosed such a thing.
The professor was fiddling with an empty glass in his hand.
- Of course, man, I will try to help you, whatever it takes. However, I need to know the nuances of this case.
- It"s hard for me to talk about it.
Felix took a bottle of vodka and filled a third of the glasses.
- I knew her mother well, Felicia was my patient. Yeah, don"t look at me like that, gynecologists are people who can fall in love and give feelings.
-Felix, I thought you and I had no secrets.
Sigmund looked at Friedland with a question. - Now I see you didn"t tell me everything.
- Yeah, not everything. As what happened was deeply personal.
- You didn"t trust me?
- Leave it along, man, it"s just none of your business. Felicia insisted that our relationship should not be in the public domain, and she often asked me not to tell anyone about it. Even the people closest to me. I couldn"t refuse her in that request. I could only guess what was behind that feeling. But now that"s not what this is about.
Sigmund pouted. What could he do? Sometimes, other people"s lives pass you by, and you can only watch.
- So what is wrong with Delice? It"s your daughter"s name, isn"t it?
- Delia started to gain weight, as if she was pregnant.
- Is she married?
- Don"t mention it, it"s another sad story.
- What is it with you and your family?
Felix nodded silently.
- Stefan, Delice' husband, crashed on a motorcycle last November. He survived, but...
- How did this happen? - Now Sigmund took a bottle of Absolute and filled the glasses, thereby demonstrating to Felix his willingness to continue the conversation.
- Having seen the obstacle, Stefan put the bike down at a tremendous speed, causing the most severe injury to the crotch.
- What? You can"t be serious!!!
-Stefan hit his crotch hard on the bike tank and shattered everything. He had everything to be cleaned, and now he"ll never have children.
- God, what a grief! How old is he?
- Thirty-five.
- What a misfortune, all lifetime seemed to be ahead.
- It seemed, and now it"s over.
Felix"s wicked irony brought things back to normal. - Now imagine his wife is pregnant. She may be having a fake pregnancy, but he doesn"t know that. Nightmare! - Felix clearly felt anxious and nervous.
- Felix, I"m going to try to help her, although I have a very weak idea how to do it. Everything depends on her mental state. Now, let"s have another 20 grams of Absolute, because the mood"s starting to fade and the foreshank is waiting, and he"ll think it"s not tasty, he"ll be offended. And then everyone will be offended - the foteshank, the beer, the cook and even the restaurant. And then we"ll never be welcomed in here again.
Having finished the vodka, the friends started eating the meat, which, though it was cold, was not any less delicious. When it was almost 10 p.m they said good-bye to each other.
*****
- I"m from Dr Friedland, he recommended you. Sigmund approached the girl who had stopped at the door and extended his hand for a greeting, then gently, as if he was afraid to frighten a fragile creature, led her to the back of the office, had her sit on the sofa and sat himself in an armchair nearby.
- I imagined you almost as you are, - the professor began smiling.
- Why almost? - asked the girl in a little blush.
- Because you"re even younger and prettier.
- Thanks, - Delice lowered her eyes.
Hoffman was examining the patient, slowly changing eyes from her face to her neck, chest, arms. She was wearing a thin blue knitted jacket and dark blue jeans. The clothes were tightly wrapped around the figure, advantageously emphasizing the shapes. Delice slowly looked up and met Dr Hoffman"s curious gaze. The professor continued to look at the girl kindly, with a barely noticeable smile. Delice looked away once again.
- Would you like tea or coffee? - she heard Sigmund"s usual question.
- Thank you, may I have some water?
The professor got up, went to the table, poured two glasses of water, came back and served one to the girl. He was deliberately repeating what the patients were asking for. These little tricks had faster contact, so they could tune in and build trust. Sigmund Hoffman didn"t want to drink, but he made it look as if he"d been thirsty since yesterday.
- Delice, tell me what brought you here.
The girl kept silent, only tightened her grip on the glass with both hands.
- Do you know what to start with?
The professor gently encouraged Del to start the conversation. She nodded.
- Well, I"ll help you. According to my good friend and a qualified gynecologist, you are worried about some condition. In our medical world, it"s called pseudoscies. Now, I"m going to give you the signs of this condition, and you"re going to try to identify them in yourself.
- And if I don"t?
- Then it will mean you"re in good health!
- All right, let"s see.
Delice suddenly found the courage to assert herself mentally.
- And so, - Professor Hoffman started quietly as if he was at a lecture at Medical University. - False pregnancies tend to develop in women who have an overwhelming desire to become pregnant or, conversely, live with a pathological fear of childbirth and pregnancy itself. These women are very vulnerable, and they have powerful emotional responses, basically hysteria. Also, they"re susceptible to suggestion, they have high levels of arousal. Now, tell me, did you want to get pregnant or were you afraid of it?
- I was afraid, Delice said quietly.
- If you think my question is tactless, you may not answer it, but I will have to ask. Why were you afraid? Were you having an affair?
The girl felt embarrassed, lowered her eyes and then quietly replied:
- Yes, I was seeing a man.
- And what did he do that caused a disorder of the hormonal and psychoemotional system?
- He loved me.
- Where is he now?
- We broke up.
- I understand, - Sigmund kept his mouth shut and then quietly asked:
- Shall we go on?
Delice nodded, and it was apparent that she had difficulty remembering it.
- The symptoms of false pregnancy include menstruation delays without regeneration, early toxemias, breast swelling, and a significant weight gain. Do you have any sign of these?
- Almost everything except for the last one. There was a bit of a weight problem, maybe I couldn"t eat anything because of the terrible toxicities.
- Tell me, when you discovered this, you went straight to your father, didn"t you? Sorry, I meant Dr. Friedland. Or did you wait for a while?
- I was afraid and I was dragging my feet to do it, as all the signs were all over my face, and all I had to do was to set an abortion date, - and Delice exhaled.
- Don"t worry. I talked to Felix, and he said you"re not pregnant, and the ultrasound results said the same thing. Stop panicking, get your fears out of your head. You"re here because you need help, and I will appease your mind if you trust me.
The professor took the girl"s hand, covered it with his own in a fatherly manner, and started to stroke it slowly.
- One day you"ll have it all again - love, family and children. You just have to find your inner balance, calm down and be patient for a little while.
Sigmund had the look of a strong man, and the patient responded with a still timid but long steady gaze.
- Well, that"s better now, - Hoffman smiled, staring into the girl"s eyes, relieving the tension caused by the prolonged pause with meaningless phrases.
- Delice, tell me about your family. What does your husband do?
- He used to be a professional motorcycle rider.
- Why do you say "used to"? Has he switched to coaching?
- No, he had an accident a few months ago, and his injuries have made sport is a thing of the past for him.
- Sorry for asking that question, - Sigmund quickly hid his small smile and put on a guilty look. - If it is too painful to remember, you don"t have to answer it, - and the professor went quiet.
In fact, Hoffman knew the terrible story that had happened to the famous Austrian motorcycle rider Stefan Adler. His old friend Felix Friedland had recounted it to him a short time before.
- It really hurts to think about it, but I understand that you"re making me talk and maybe even accept the grief so I could gradually be convinced and could heal.
- It"s a pleasure to work with you. You"re such a smart girl, yet you are very vulnerable.
- Vulnerable, - Del echoed the doctor"s last word. - I thought losing my baby would be the gravest grief in my life, but it doesn"t seem to be the case.
- Delice, have you been happily married? - Sigmund tried to change the subject.
- I wouldn"t say so, I"m afraid. But since Florian was born, I secretly hoped that things would change. Unfortunately, that never happened.
- If you don"t mind, could you tell me about your relationship with your husband in more detail?
Del Adler took a close look at the professor and then looked down at her wrist as if she wanted to know what time it was.
- I worked as a receptionist in a big law firm. Everything was as usual, every day there were hundreds of clients, everyone with their issues. But with only one lawyer each encounter was always accompanied by a warm smile, and sometimes even chocolate and flowers. It didn"t take long, I fell in love. I was twenty-three. All of a sudden, I was head over heels in love, but there was just one downside to the situation: the lawyer had a family. I didn"t want to wait. I wasn"t going to. When, after another yet occasion of making love in his office, I asked him about our further relationship, I got an unexpected answer: "Is there anything you"re unhappy about?"
Our relationship was actually very sincere, but I wasn"t ready to face such a challenge and always be the other woman for the man I loved. And then my love turned into dislike. So, from that moment on, he was disgusting to me, and I spotted completely different qualities of his which I had initially turned a blind eye to. Eventually, having met a nice guy, I married him out of pure spite. I vented my spite on myself and "my lawyer". It would be inappropriate to talk about love in this marriage. A couple of months later, the lawyer begged me to leave Stefan, and to prove he still had feelings for me, he even got divorced, leaving his wife with their child. But it was too late. In fact, I used to live by the principle that the world was only black and white, there were no halftones for me in between, there were only the two extremes. The next thing I knew, I got pregnant and during that time Stefan showed himself to the full. A biker, an athlete, an interesting man and me, a woman who is seven months pregnant. I mean, you"re a man, - It wasn"t clear if Delice was questioning or stating the fact. - Of all people you should know if men know how to be patient. Regardless of your answer, I can tell you that the word "patience" is unfamiliar to them. If they want something, they want it there and that very minute and not a second later. The same thing happened with Stefan. At first, he worshipped me, but as soon as the gynecologist asked him to cool his jets in bed because of my pregnancy, he had no trouble whatsoever replacing me with some kind of a monster.
Delice"s last words made Professor Hoffman realize that Delice was annoyed and could not remain indifferent when talking about the events that had been left behind.
- There were times when Stefan would stay out all night, and he could tell me anything, but I knew exactly where he spent the night and with whom. I was disgusted, but my doctors strongly advised me against getting nervous. And I put up with that for the sake of our baby"s health, but then things got even worse. It turns out some men aren"t necessarily happy to have their first child. Stefan may not have been mature enough to be a father, but since Florian"s arrival his behavior was outright defiant. A month after the birth of our son, he declared that he could not bear to be at home: the baby was always crying and keeping him awake. Soon, he got completely withdrawn and behaved like a stranger. He must have been having an affair, sometimes I got telephone calls and was told that he was seen with another woman at a cafe, at the stadium, outside a hotel. Of course, the resentment filled my heart, and I knew I had made a mistake, but what could I do if that man was my child"s father.
A trivial story that happens to millions of women. Expectations, tears, pain ... And then frustration, the desire to regain confidence, and as a result starting an affair of her own. There are millions of stories like that. Statistically, at least 80 percent of families have been through this. In some cases, they"ve overcome this, and in others they"ve broken up not wanting to live a lie.
According to Delice Adler"s story, she put up with what was going on and turned a blind eye to many things, but the resentment kept building up, and as a result love never came, and her heart was hardened towards her husband. After the tragedy with Florian, the pain of loss and the fear of loneliness brought Del and Stefan closer. Like two wandering strangers, they reached out to each other, trying to seek forgiveness for the sins of the past.
- What about your lawyer? Did he stop stalking you? How long ago did you see him? - Hoffman asked randomly. Delice looked up in surprise.
- Not so long ago we met on a lunch break at a McDonald"s, talked for about an hour, but my heart didn"t miss a beat. He asked me to come back to their law firm, promised a good position, and cautiously hinted at a proposal. Now, I don"t even know what to do. After breaking up with Lucas, the skies came crashing down.
- That"s enough for today Del, - the shrink gently interrupted her. -Let"s wrap it up. No more emotions for today, let"s leave this story for tomorrow.
- Professor, I"m so glad Felix introduced me to you. I have never thought men can listen and get it all like that, I don"t even want to leave.
- My dear girl, everything will be all right. I"ll be expecting you tomorrow at 4:00 pm. And you mustn"t worry - believe me, we"ll get you fixed up. Besides, I promised Felix I"d help.
Hoffman smiled and shook the girl"s hand to say goodbye.
*****
It was lunchtime. It was sunny but but not calm at all. It was the wind that was to blame for this natural agitation. It seemed to derive sheer pleasure from ambushing anything that moved under its touch. Trees and bushes fluttered their green clothing in bewilderment, silently begging to bring this dangerous game to an end.
- It looks like it"s going to bring in some rain again, - said Karl quietly. Then, turning to his mentor who was sitting at his cumbersome desk, he blurted out angrily:
- Why is it that every time there"s a rare case, it lands in your lap?
- I"m telling you: it was a special request from my old pal Friedland.
- Professor, have you had such patients before?
- I have never had anyone with such a rare diagnosis. Although I think the number of women who have experienced a false pregnancy is much higher than the official figures indicate.
- Professor Hoffman, you have to share your experience of getting a patient out of this state.
- Karl, in fact, the technique is very simple: first to be able to listen and get to the bottom of the matter, then to be able to coax the patient out of her delusion.
- And what about this case? Is it complicated? - Karl couldn"t hide his interest.
- I don"t think it"s very complicated, though taking into account all the emotional turmoil, it"s not clear how the poor girl managed to get through all this.
- What do you mean saying the case is not complicated?
- I"m referring to the exterior signs: weight gain, breast swelling and an expanding waistline. Del doesn"t have any of these. If we had all the signs, you would be standing by and hypnotizing the girl.